the knuckle head

     My husband's son just turned 8, we have a constant battle with him over eating, don't get me wrong, he will eat, just not at a pace in which the food will be completely consumed by the time I turn 60. He thinks that dinner time is time to make shadow puppets on the wall and has to take a drink in between EVERY bite. I constantly (literally every bite) tell him to eat or to actually not put down his fork, to keep it in his hand, to which my husband then gets pissy about and says "he is eating, leave him alone", which then undermines any hint of authority that I may have had! . He throws tantrums like a 2yr old, sticks his head way forward and squints his eyes, talks back, grumbles under his breath. All of this happens simultaneously when you tell him to get dressed, brush his teeth, eat, or ANYTHING that does not involve the computer or video games or TV or whatever it is he thinks he should be doing at the time besides what we want him to do. In this situation he fights my husband as well, Talking back to the two of us like we have no right at all to be telling HIM what to do…how we could ever expect HIM to do something HE doesn't want to do. I don't know if he behaves like this towards his mother but my god man…what are we supposed to do. This fission also has bred a special kind of contempt on his part towards me...I love him to death and am pretty sure he loves me to but I believe in his mind I am the ultimate evil step-mother..Hahaha.

    I have 2 teens that NEVER acted out in the ways that this child does, but I started at a very young age with them, working on manners etc. I hate comparing him to mine, but damn my kids were fantastically well behaved compared to this child!!! ARGH!!! I can't imagine what condition my sanity would have been in by now had my 2 been anything like that. The smarter they are the more stubborn, the harder they fall (or you fall).  Any step-parents out there with any advice?  Should we just keep plowing thru and hope that eventually he gets sick of hearing us repeat these things over and over and just starts complying one day? I am close to just falling to pieces or ignoring him all together, giving up, let him act however, whenever he wants…. What do we (or I) do?

 

     PS- I love the picture, he had just lost his first front tooth and the "billy-bob" look was to good not to capture for future blackmail.  Man, i love this kid!