Thursday, March 18, 2010

can you say "oops"

So, I had the day from hell yesterday.


Let me start at the beginning, I was sitting here talking to Frankie on the phone and my boss walks up (I see him out of the corner of my eye) and in my best professional voice I say "okay then, I will add that to the Meeting Agenda and see you tomorrow, buh-bye" hehehe…. I am allowed to talk on my own phone at work only so much, so Frankie calls me at work with the understanding that when I say something like that it really means "I'm gonna get in a shit ton of trouble if I'm not off the phone in 10seconds..I love you I will call you back when I can."  So my boss says will you please join me in "other higher up" boss's office. Me being the Angel that I am say "Uh-Oh, what did I do this time-Hahaha" Boss #1 looks at me and says. You are in violation of County policy number blah blah blah…are you aware that your drivers license (DL) has been suspended since Jan. 15th(or something, I was floored and basically quit listening when he said suspended" see the thing is…I drive for work, not a lot, but enough. It is a serious offense to drive a government vehicle on a suspended license. They (boss #1 and Higher boss #2) go on to tell me that unless I can prove that it was a mistake, all 22 times that I have driven a county car – EACH TIME WILL COUNT AS A SINGLE VIOLATION!!! Code of conduct- personnel policies state that driving a county vehicle without a, or on a suspended DL is a termination qualifying event. "HOLY SHIT" I think" I am gonna lose my job" I don't even know what I did. Let alone why it is suspended. So I cried…. I cried buckets, I broke down and sobbed big fat girly tears and tried to explained to them thru all those tears that I had absolutely no idea that it had been done and had no idea what I had done to get it done and oh my god what do I do??? They couldn't believe I didn't know, they laughed at me and said "wow, you're good, crying like that, PROVE IT."

My supervisors laughed at me and called me a liar to my face.  I promptly ran to the bathroom and cried so hard I was hyperventilating, cried harder than I did at my Grandmothers funeral, cried so hard I thought I was gonna never be able to stop long enough to ever talk again…I can not lose my job, absolutely not an option. I got on the phone with MVD and found out that the ticket I got last Oct. for not having proof of registration in my car, that the woman at the Justice Courts said she would delay the $520.00 fine on had to be paid and since it wasn't, they sent it to collections and suspended my DL. Long story short, I fucking forgot all about it. The ticket was gone, I went and showed the courts my registration but I didn't have $520 so she deferred payment and said I had till Dec. something to pay it and I totally fucking forgot! They never sent me notice of suspension or a reminder that I needed to pay; they just fucked my whole fucking world.  Anyhow I am not gonna lose my job; all I have to do is prove that I never received notification that my license was suspended and I am fine. I paid the ticket and the fines and the SR-22 insurance (2nd time in less than 3yrs my license has been suspended, state requirement) ready for the grand total….A $520 ticket cost me $884 to take care of, Fines fees etc. and that does not even count the $35 that I still have to pay to get my DL reinstated!

       I hate myself so bad right now. All the hard (extra) work that Frankie has been doing for a little extra money so we can catch up on some VERY delinquent bills…GONE. I am such a schmuck. I understand that everyone makes mistakes and I am totally not looking for any kind of sympathy but jesuusss, did it have to be such and expensive fuck up. Things were finally starting to look like we were catching up. FUCK!!! ARGH!!! No I am just mad. I hate crying I hate driving I hate having to pretend to be a responsible adult. I just want to curl up under the covers and never ever get up again!

UGH, sorry, it does feel better to get it out and I think this may be the longest blog post ever for me! Later…