I just read this on Dad Gone Mad and thought it was to good not to pass on...
1-I just got herpes from Dick Cheney.
2-I just farted in my happy place.
3-I just let the dogs out.
4-I just dry-humped Melissa Etheridge.
5-I just threw up in that person's mouth.
6-I just dry heaved and that made someone else throw up in my mouth.
7-I just threw up in my butt.
8-I just forgot how to throw up.
9-I just threw up and it tasted like a Pop-Tart.
10-I just crapped in my adult diaper.
11-I didn't really just throw up in my mouth but I say I did because that's what everyone says when they see something gross.
12I'm thinking about throwing up in my mouth.
13-I'm presently throwing up in my mouth, so I'd better stop talking now.
14-See this? It's throw-up. It was in my mouth a second ago, but I found it kind of pointless to keep it there so I opened my mouth and now it's right there. Sweet, huh?
15-Mouth throw-up. It's what's for dinner.
16-Mouth throw-up. The other reddish-orangish-brown meat.
17-I really need to find a different blog to read.